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Tweeter: MikeRylander Page 1

Mike Rylander


http://www.twitter.com/MikeRylander

MikeRylander Twitter 2/28 @ 5:16 PM
MikeRylander - Leader of anti-Putin group warned Putin will kill him, killed in front of Kremlin. Putin condemns kill, oversees investigation. #YOLORussia
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/27 @ 2:33 PM
MikeRylander - More money, more problems (that didn't exist before you had money because all your focus was on your lack of money problem).
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/26 @ 9:03 AM
MikeRylander - I bet George Zimmerman would make a great nanny.
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/26 @ 1:11 AM
MikeRylander - Mitch McConnell should change his name to Fish McilooklikeafishConnell
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/24 @ 11:57 AM
MikeRylander - .@NSA_PAO Searching YouTube for "cockroaches having sex" was for work, okay?
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/24 @ 9:58 AM
MikeRylander - Missed a big audition yesterday cuz I started class at UCB again & I was rusty so I played poorly & made bad 1st impressions. Happy Tuesday!
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/24 @ 9:04 AM
MikeRylander - FUN NEWS! @WTFark will be on national TV today. @RightThisMinute is featuring our Hipster Baby Names PSA. DETAILS: https://t.co/U6MC0Z3et5
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/23 @ 11:30 PM
MikeRylander - DOES ANYONE KNOW HOW TO TURN OFF BRAINS? ASKING FOR ME, A SLAVE TO MY BRAIN.
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/23 @ 8:48 PM
MikeRylander - I made an insane thing at work today. RT @WTFark O'MALLEY MATTRESSES COMMERCIAL (WATCH) http://t.co/XcPu1S6QDz http://t.co/sKAgi7yw0X
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/23 @ 12:21 PM
MikeRylander - Hey look at that, my little web show @WTFark is @verified now! ...but I am not. So to recap, WTFark = legit, Mike Rylander = bullshit.
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/23 @ 1:35 AM
MikeRylander - UPDATE: Watching John Travolta on Jimmy Kimmel and yup, he's still just as creepy as he was about an hour ago.
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/23 @ 12:26 AM
MikeRylander - Mexican director, black singers, gay writer, aging actress all win big with statements on equality. American Sniper doesn't. CUE FOX NEWS!
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/23 @ 12:08 AM
MikeRylander - PS: I think Sean Penn was on Sean Penn. #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/23 @ 12:05 AM
MikeRylander - No, Sean Penn. No. #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/23 @ 12:01 AM
MikeRylander - NEVER FORGET. #Oscars2015 http://t.co/ByiCGnovWA
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 11:58 PM
MikeRylander - Nice preggo pause, McConaughey. You're such a charming dick! God, I so get why we all just love it. #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 11:56 PM
MikeRylander - Matthew McConaughey's beard reminds me of the time when Beavis and Butthead glued their pubes to their faces. #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 11:43 PM
MikeRylander - If Wes Anderson would've won, do you think he would've ridden up to the stage on a llama or tortoise? #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 11:38 PM
MikeRylander - Uncle Jesse gets to go to the Oscars??? If I were Coulier or Saget, I'd be pissed. (but I'm petty and insecure) #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 11:36 PM
MikeRylander - In fact, we should all be thanking Oprah. All of us. For everything. Get your shit together, humanity. #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 11:30 PM
MikeRylander - Oh shit! Here come some joeks! ........................................................................................ or not. #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 11:26 PM
MikeRylander - YOU GUYS, EDDIE MURPHY IS GOING TO PRESENT! oh right, he doesn't do jokes anymore. #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 11:21 PM
MikeRylander - And now, Julie Andrews covers Lady Gaga and we all ascend into a higher plane of existence. #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 11:20 PM
MikeRylander - In all honesty, I'd love to see a Sound of Music production starring Lady Gaga's tattoos. #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 11:14 PM
MikeRylander - "Mmm. I'd like to wear this one too..." http://t.co/kfQ8HkodvZ
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 11:10 PM
MikeRylander - MOVIE CRITICS: Please start rating all movies on a "Crying Chris Pine" scale. For example, I give Selma 4.5 Crying Chris Pines. #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 11:08 PM
MikeRylander - That was my favorite moment of the evening. #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 11:05 PM
MikeRylander - John "remember when I was normal, kinda" Travolta #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 11:00 PM
MikeRylander - The only way the briefcase bit *might* work is if it's the briefcase from Pulp Fiction and we get to see what is inside. #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 10:58 PM
MikeRylander - Ugh. Had to stop tweeting about an awards show for playing make believe to (*eye roll*) be a good father for sec. LAME-O. #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 10:33 PM
MikeRylander - I wonder if NPH's Oscar hosting career will be featured in the In Memoriam? (Oh snap I went there!) #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 10:29 PM
MikeRylander - "I wonder what it'd be like to wear him..." http://t.co/DfagH7iMeq
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 10:26 PM
MikeRylander - Pouring one out for Dick Poop... #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 10:19 PM
MikeRylander - Come on Dick Poop slip... #Oscars2015
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MikeRylander Twitter 2/22 @ 10:11 PM
MikeRylander - Big Hero 6 was the first movie I ever took my daughter to, so since I have made this about me, I APPLAUD THIS WIN. #Oscars2015
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